Contentment

Can I share with you something that has really been on my heart lately?  Contentment.  These two verses have really been laid upon my heart these last few months:



"Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.
 I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need."  Philippians 4:11-12



I have the verses written on my bathroom mirror, so this verse is in my face everyday.  It's a constant reminder of my failure in this area of my life. 
Why is contentment such a hard character trait for me to grasp?  I mean, when I stop and think about it, I have much to be content with.  I am so blessed!  I have an amazing husband who not only loves me unconditionally, he cares for me, listens to me, and guides me.  I learn so much from him in our daily family Bible Time.  I also have two beautiful children!  They always have a way of making me smile, despite circumstances.  They make my day brighter and they make me want to be a better person, so that I may be an example for them.  We have a roof over our head, food to eat, and we're always able to pay our bills on time.  What could there possibly be to complain about?! 

I even have a picture that sits in the window sill above my kitchen sink that reminds me daily about being content:

It reads:  "We thank God for dirty dishes, for they have a story to tell.  While other families go hungry, we are eating very well.  With Love and Health and Happiness, we shouldn't want to fuss.  By this stack of evidence, God's been very good to us!"

So with all of these reminders, why do I still find myself thinking or even SAYING words of ungratefulness?  It's because I am human of a filthy flesh.  But I am a new creature in Christ, and therefore, those days I find myself not thankful for God's blessings in my life, are often the days I have missed my Quiet Time with Him.  They are often times where I have let the busyness of life take my focus off of what really matters, and focus upon my own selfishness.

Take these dishes for example.  Recently, the electric panel on our dishwasher went out.  Now, I'm washing dishes by hand.  We cook about every meal, so dishes pile up fast!  I always have pots and pans loaded upon the counter.  What is my first reaction?  Is it to thank God for having a dishwasher for so long?  Is it to be thankful for those dirty dishes, like the picture in front of me says, because those dishes mean a fed family?  NO!!!  My initial reaction is to grumble and complain.  Why?  Because it's an inconvenience to ME!  It all falls back to selfishness....maybe a little bit of laziness as well.  Either way, it's sin.
Why is it, that I feel so strongly that I am called to stay home to raise my children, but when opportunities come along for me to discipline them, I get frustrated?  It's because I'm inconvenienced.  Their disobedience is leading to an interruption of what I was doing.  But if I'm cleaning the bathroom and a discipline problem arises, where are my priorities?  Was I not called to train my children up in the ways of the Lord?


Ephesians 6:4

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

My primary purpose is not the clean the bathroom!  It's to raise my children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord!  I should rejoice that I'm able to be the one to correct my children as opposed to a babysitter or a school teacher.  There are many moms who would love to be at home with their children so that THEY could be the ones correcting them! 
I see this in reflection, but why don't I see it in the moment?  Why am I so focused on a task?  My husband probably won't even notice if I don't clean the bathroom.  So why is it so important to me?!  My priorities are not straight.

When I have a newborn and have to get up in the middle of the night, I usually grunt when I hear that baby cry.  I don't want to get out of bed.  But there are many moms who have babies who never wake up.  Surely I should be grateful that when my baby cries, I realize that means life is coming out of that little body!

Potty Training has been my current frustration.  Most moms I talk to say how EASY potty training was.  I guess I feel like if my child isn't potty trained by 2, well, then I'm doing something wrong as a mom. 

The truth is, my child is still not potty trained, but she is MUCH better.  I had to give it over to the Lord.  I wrote in down in my prayer journal.  After a couple of weeks of giving it to the Lord everyday, I had VAST improvement.  Yes, despite the improvement, at times, I find myself thinking, "Oh, why did she have to have an accident now?!  I'm in the middle of something."  My heart isn't content with what God has called me to do.

Therefore, I have a CHARACTER problem. Even worse, if you were to come over to my house, I'd be sooooo patient with my children.  I wouldn't have a frustrated tone.  I would drop whatever I was doing to tend to them (for wanting to appear as a good parent).  But God sees my heart.  He sees the everyday.  So even if I appear as though I'm doing well to the world....I know better, and so does He. 

So who do I want to please?  If I'm willing to be patient when friends are over, shouldn't I want to be patient all the time, when God is watching?! 

I have such a long way to go in this area, but there are a few things that have helped me improve:

1)  Prayer!  I have to pray about it! This means I have to write it down in my prayer journal so I don't FORGET to pray about it.  First, by doing this, it reminds me daily of the issue.  Secondly, it reminds me that I need to give it to Him.  Just as my struggle with gluttony (as I mentioned in a previous post), I just can't do it on my own.  I HAVE to lean on Him. 

2)  In my prayer journal, on the very first page are a list of items that I thank God for.  When I pray, I ask for forgiveness of my sins and ask God to show me even the things I feel as insignificant sins, so that I may repent for them specifically and make them right.  Next, I THANK God for all He has done and is currently doing in my life!  It used to be that I would pray for my needs first.  The problem with this, I would never get around to thanking Him.  If I thank Him first, often when I bring my needs to Him, many of them really don't seem so bad anymore!

3)  I try and surround myself with like-minded people.  If I'm always around someone who wants more or is buying something I wish I had, I will find it hard to remain content.  Yes, I need to learn to be like Paul and remain content regardless of my situation.  However, I don't want to surround myself with people who are not like-minded, and then I struggle with alone.  I want friends who will share my burden, and I theirs.  I want to AVOID temptation.

4)  Another thing I try and do is to try and ask forgiveness (even from my young children) when I wrong someone.  We have a rule in our house:  "If you wrong someone publically, you apologize publically."  Since I struggle with pride, this is not something I want to do.  I do NOT like to admit that I am wrong.  After saying I'm wrong a few times, it begins to humble you and make you realize your sins more as God sees them.

5)  Sometimes just looking at other's situations who are less fortunate than you can bring you to your knees.  When I really think about the people who would LOVE to clean dishes after every meal because that meant that they had food to eat....it humbles me.  It breaks my heart.  How can I complain (even just in my thoughts) about the blessings God has given me?  I'm convinced that if God blessed me with $1 million dollars, I'd find something I didn't like about it (maybe how much I'd have to pay in taxes).  I don't want this attitude.  Just as I look at others who are less fortunate, I should be able to look at others who seem more blessed than myself and thank God for blessing them!  Isn't that the right attitude?!

So these are my tips!  This is something I struggle with on a daily basis, but am committed to overcome with the grace and mercy of my Lord Jesus Christ.  What about you?  Do you struggle with contentment?  What are some things that have helped you to be content with God's blessings, or maybe even His chastisement?  I would love to hear your comments and words of encouragement!